Panic Attacks, Anxiety and Depression – Marianne’s Story

By: | Tags: , | Comments: 0 | July 27th, 2011

How I got my life back or I would have been dead by now!

Rather dramatic headline but true. This story is for all women and their families. If you feel bad, sick and helpless my story can help you because there is light at the end of the tunnel.

I truly believe if my friend Debra had not handed me the torn out page of a flight magazine with feature on the Hotze Health & Wellness Center, I would not be writing this letter right now. I only regret not hearing about them 12 years earlier.

It all started in 1993, with a medical, surgical error of a gynecologist that caused major endometriosis and scar tissue growth in that when the hysterectomy was performed they had to halt it because everything inside the stomach was interconnected and the surgeon considered it to dangerous to proceed at that time. This was in 2000. Later, in 2002, through laparoscopy the ovaries and scar tissue was removed.

After these surgeries, I thought my nightmare of feeling sick, muscle and joint pain, cognitive dysfunction and horrible mood swings would be alleviated by taking the prescribed Estradiol. I thought it would bring me on an even keel.

Two months later, I had my first panic attack. Over the next months these attacks increased, and were accompanied with crippling depression and insomnia. Our family doctor prescribed Ambien, which would give me an hour sleep. She gave me Zoloft and after a week of not sleeping at all, not eating and nauseated, the suicidal thoughts came. I really did not want to live anymore. At that time these drugs did not come with a warning that they may cause suicidal thoughts. One morning when I was too sick to drive to work I planned my suicide and got ready to execute my plan when the phone rang, automatically I picked up (nothing is coincidental they say). It was the doctor’s nurse to ask me how I was doing. When she understood what was going on she told me to call my husband and go to the emergency room. How unfortunate, because they put me in a psychiatric ward where of course I was given several drugs.

This was a different experience, I felt so bad for these poor people locked up in there and felt I did not belong there. I was released after two days and sent to a psychiatrist who, of course, put me on an antidepressant, Wellbutrin and a tranquilizer, Klonopin.

My observation to every doctor that my mental state coincided with the hysterectomy fell on deaf ears. I went to several gynecologists an endocrinologist and 3 different psychiatrists. They only doled out psych drugs like candy. Here try this? When upping the dose of Klonopin to 1 mg did not work I refused to take bigger doses. One psychiatrist even told me I could take this drug for 2 years without a problem. As they say — yeah right. After 6 months I was hooked.

I have never taken any illegal drugs and even always felt hesitant regarding prescribed medications.

An illustration of how little attention some of these doctors pay to their patients is when I was on my 2nd or 3rd visit with one of the psychiatrists, she walked in the room saying: “Oh you are the one who hears voices in her head?” Never had I mentioned voices. It stunned me especially when she prescribed a twin medication to Zoloft that sent me spiraling down into the suicidal thought abyss, after which she gave me Remeron 15 mg.

I am amazed now that I did not lose my job or my husband during this those years. It was very trying for my husband. I felt so bad for him and was grateful we did not have any children at home. My husband stood by my side and even though he did not always understand what was going on he always believed in me.

After stumbling another year through the fog of these drugs and still in pain and misery, I stepped into the Hotze Health & Wellness Center. What an eye opening visit. Dr. Sheridan was courteous, understanding and knowledgeable. He confirmed my suspicions regarding the connection between hormones and the problems I was having. What a relief. These doctors look at the big picture, your entire body and mind, not chopped up in pieces like other doctors.

I was diagnosed with hormonal imbalance, adrenal fatigue, clinical hypothyroidism and yeast overgrowth. They instructed me regarding diet, exercise, hormonal treatment and supplements. Of course there was also the issue of weaning off the anti-depressants and Klonopin.

Over the past year and a half the Hotze Team has walked by my side, guiding me back from the hell I was living in. Because of the weaning off Klonopin, Wellbutrin and Remeron it has not been a walk in the park, to say the least. Some of these drugs reportedly are worse to get rid of than street drugs. Through their continued support, my determination to get well became strong. Dr. Sheridan, Janet, the physician assistant, and the nurses would encourage me each time. I would hit a very hard spot while reminding me how far I had already made it through.

Most of their patients get well after a few months through their program, but due to the medications I was taking it has been a little longer for me. Nevertheless, it has been worth it because every day is one step closer towards health and happiness.

Dr. Sheridan and his team have gone more than the extra mile for me and I am very grateful.   I wish I could reach out to all women so that they may not have to go on the treacherous path that I walked on. I have encountered already too many of them on anti-depressants and tranquilizers and too many of them not seeing a way out of their pain.

Every time I tell them of the good news… yes there is light at the end of the tunnel and you can get well.  I am now at the very end of tapering of Remeron and feeling better every day. I am so happy I do not have to see the psychiatrist any more. I am so happy to feel happy again. I am so happy that depression is now a thing of the past and the anxiety demon is gone too! I am so happy to be excited about the future at 51 years of age and my husband is so happy to have his good wife back.

Thank you Dr. Sheridan, Janet and the whole team at the Hotze Health & Wellness Center for your continued support and medical care.

Can you relate to Marianne’s story? Contact us today and let us help you get your life back!

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